College Football Week 2 Review

Week two of the college football season is over, and in all honesty it was kind of just “meh”. Blowouts on top of blowouts, as expected, from the top teams in the country. We did get to see some madness though. Week 2 brought us an exciting game where we almost got to see the #2 team in the country lose after a fourth quarter comeback. We can also thank Week 2 for bringing us two Top 25 upsets (one upset ended a 31-year streak). Let’s take a look back at some of the bigger games from this past weekend, and let’s start building up some excitement for Week 3.

Kentucky Ends a 31-Year Streak

31 years. 31 fucking years. Could you imagine having to wait that long just for your favorite college to beat a team again? Sounds like a miserable life. Kentucky was able to pull off the upset thanks to Florida’s inability to stop their rushing attack of Benny Snell and quarterback Terry Wilson. Wilson also converted through the air on some big-time plays to help build UK’s lead. So congrats, Kentucky. You’ve pulled off what was basically the impossible. Realistically, this should’ve probably been Kentucky’s third win of the Mark Stoops era against Florida (see below).

But we won’t bring those other two games up. Instead, we’ll the Kentucky fanbase enjoy this victory over Florida, and boy oh boy should they enjoy it while they can. Something tells me another long drought is on the way after Coach Dan Mullen gets his players/recruits on campus. Expect the old Florida to be back soon.

Herm Edwards’ Sun Devils Upset Sparty

Crazy how it was just a week ago when MSU fans were trying to run their mouth about Michigan losing at Notre Dame. I guess Sparty didn’t get the memo that they only beat Utah State by 7 at home and they weren’t really good. If you watched this game, then congrats. You really love football. If you didn’t watch this game, then I’ll recap it for you. Michigan State scored a touchdown in the 3rd Quarter. Arizona State scored a TD in the 4th Quarter. Combined, there were 5 field goals. Not that exciting of a game. But hey, that’s not important. What’s important is Herm Edwards is winning football games while Michigan State loses them.

Wonder what Herm Edwards pregame speech might’ve been? Something tells me he went to “ole reliable” to get his team pumped up.

I’m Guessing Kelly Bryant is Clemson’s QB

Clemson avoided an upset at Texas A&M by winning 28-26, and they’re lucky they escaped with a W after their sloppy 4th quarter. Well, I wouldn’t say sloppy. Just lackluster. But the biggest thing to notice is that Dabo Sweeney chose to ride with Kelly Bryant over freshman Trevor Lawrence. When Lawrence came in for the Tigers, he didn’t really do much. He did have a 64-yard touchdown pass, but he can thank Tee Higgins for making that play for him. Lawrence finished 5 for 9 with 93 yards and a touchdown, while Bryant went 12 for 17 with 205 yards and a touchdown. Bryant also had 15 carries for 54 yards and a touchdown. Clemson does have Georgia Southern next Saturday though, so expect that game to serve as one last tryout between the two players.

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Alabama curb-stomped Arkansas State, 57-7. Georgia handled conference rival South Carolina, 41-17. Wisconsin destroyed New Mexico, 45-14 Oklahoma effortlessly defeated UCLA, 49-21. Auburn played Alabama State, so that final was 63-9. LSU was able to shutout Southeastern Louisiana, winning 31-0. Washington 45 North Dakota 3. Virginia Tech and West Virginia joined in on the FCS Ass Whoopings, beating William & Mary 62-17 and Youngstown State 52-17. Penn State raped Pitt 51-6 and Ohio State beat the shit out of Rutgers 52-3. The only thing that’s surprising about those last two results? Both school’s came forward and shared the information right away, and they did so proudly.

No, that’s not a joke about rape or domestic violence. Just a reminder that these are two shitty schools/programs that are quick to jump and point at their accomplishments on the football field while still trying to hide all the skeletons that are in their closet. If you believe I was making a rape/domestic violence joke after this explanation, then you’re a dummy. That simple.

Hopefully this week’s Top 25 games will be a little bit more entertaining to watch, since some of them should be a little bit more competitive. Oklahoma travels to Iowa State, UCF goes to UNC, and Wisconsin takes on BYU. The REALLY exciting games though? LSU travels to Auburn, West Virginia goes on the road to NC State, Oklahoma State and Boise State face-off in Stillwater, Alabama is hoping to avoid an upset at Ole Miss, TCU will hopefully beat the shit out of Ohio State, and USC takes on Texas in a rematch of the 2006 Rose Bowl/a really good game last year. I. Can’t. Wait.

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I Hope Kevin Sumlin Hasn’t Unpacked

Kevin Sumlin’s Arizona Wildcats are off to a pretty miserable 0-2 start, which includes a 45-18 asswhooping handed to them by Houston. So yeah, the Kevin Sumlin era isn’t going as planned. Who’s to blame? Well, probably Kevin Sumlin, since it seems as if he’s somehow broken Khalil Tate. in 2017, Tate had 3002 total yards and 26 total touchdowns. This year, Tate only has three touchdowns. He’s struggled in the passing game this year, having only completed 51% of his passes for 1 touchdown and 2 interceptions. Tate also only has 22 TOTAL rushing yards this year. Whatever is wrong with Khalil Tate, Sumlin needs to figure it out and fix it fast before he finds himself out of a job again.

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