Florida’s Going to Omaha and Auburn’s Right Fielder Has to Retire From Baseball

Such a great game by both teams unless you bet on Florida -1.5 like me. Defensive plays were being made all over the place, and it was appearing like this game could go 20 innings if it had to. And then, it happened.

I’m not sure of the kid’s name, but the whole world will know it soon. This kid goes to make the jumping grab to make sure he can get his defensive highlight in with the rest of the team. He knows he’s about to be a hero, and maybe he’ll even end up on Sportscenter’s Top 10 plays. But instead, he shits the bed. The guy goes bonkers and just helps assist the ball over the fence to give Florida a walk-off homerun.

Does it suck that this happened? Of course. What sucks even more is that there may actually be some people out there that attack him pretty harshly, and who knows? Some may love Auburn baseball so much that they just haul off and tell the kid to kill himself (which no one should do it’s never that serious). He’s going to have to hear about it all off-season. On road games next year, the home crowd will be sure to let him know about it. If he makes it to MiLB or if he’s lucky enough The Show, people will always heckle him and remind him of the time he cost his team a trip to the College World Series. Sports fans SUCK because they never let anything go, and there’s only one way to move past this whole thing.

Retire from baseball.

It’s not worth it kid. Just run away into the dark night. Move to a small town out West where no one will know you. Get a job as a bank teller and don’t tell anyone your full name. This is the only way you can avoid being hurt by the evil sports fans of the world.

It sucks that it had to happen this way, kid. Good luck and I hope no one goes too crazy on you.


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